I have found myself thinking about this quite a bit lately. Jerusalem is one of the most interesting places that I have ever been and I am really excited to explore this question while living in the religious capital of the world. Everywhere you look, you see people who are, in a way, saying “this is what my religion means to me” (or at least we assume that they are making a statement like this) whether its men in black hats and long black coats with peyot or women with covered heads and long skirts, or even just men with keepot, people are making statements about what being a Jew is to them, at least in some way or another. What separates these people from the woman on the bus with her head covered in modest dress who is Muslim?
So, is being a Jew the way that we dress?
Is being a Jew the way that we pray?
Is being a Jew how religious I am? Whether or not I keep Shabbat?
Is being a Jew the food that I eat?
Is being a Jew living in Israel or being Israeli or even just supporting Israel?
Is being a Jew just a matter of being born to a Jewish mother?
Is it knowing how to ask the right question?
Or is being a Jew simply a shared cultural heritage and shared background of persecution?
I don’t think that any one thing can define what makes someone a Jew. Its hard enough to define whey we are Jewish ourselves, let alone a whole population.
Is being a Jew the way that we dress?
I find myself wondering as it gets hotter and hotter out during the day, how the hell do they do it? The men in the full Haredi attire, they must be dying dressed like that! And really, why are they dressed like that? Some of it I understand, but some of it I don’t. I love seeing the young men dressed in Haredi clothes. You see them from behind with a group of older men and you can see that they are a bit younger, and then they turn and there in front of you is this baby-face. Never what I expect. I find myself looking at them and wondering how many of them chose this? How many of them believe this? And how many of them were just born into it and do what they do because its what the people before them did?
In terms of the way that we pray:
One of my favorite things about praying as a Jew is the reason that we pray. We have a prayer for just about everything. Really, what other religion has a prayer for after you go to the bathroom? Even though I will never be the type of person who prays after I make a tinkle, I think the reason that religious Jew’s do that is important. Many times in life we take things for granted. Who thinks after going to the bathroom, wow, thank G-d I can do that? I guarantee the people who can’t go to the bathroom on their own would be thanking someone if they were able to do it again. Its about simply taking the moment to appreciate the things that we are able to do.
Keeping Shabbat:
That’s what I love about Shabbat. Again, I am not sure if I will ever become shomer Shabbat. It is just not something that I see myself doing, in the traditional sense. However, I love the appreciation that Shabbat brings. Too often in life we spend each day running from here to there, never taking a moment to pause and appreciate each day. When we are young we are out partying or spend our weekends studying or doing homework, or just droning out in front of the television. As we get older and have families, we are busy doing laundry, driving the kids here and there, catering to their every need. The beautiful thing about Shabbat is that it’s a day off from all of that. Spending the day with family, not in front of the TV, not thinking about al the things that we have to do tomorrow, it’s a really beautiful thing.
I went on a hike with Livnot U’lehibanot in December. We were walking down the mountain and I thought to myself, here I am, walking down this mountain with this beautiful view, and I am so worried about where I am walking (with good reason) that I am not appreciating where I am. Our leader, Yehonatan, suggested that we pause every now and again and take a “Shabbat moment”. Just to slow down, look around and appreciate the beauty of the place that we are in. It was a wonderful thing to be able to do and to take the time to really appreciate all of the beauty in the world.
The food that we eat:
The food that we, as Jews, eat is as different as the people who make up the Jewish population of Israel. You have the Yemenite Jews, who make the most amazing bread type food called “jaqnun.” The Moroccan Jews who have all sorts of unique dishes, but wafle is one that they are known for in particular. The rest of the Sephardic Jews, the Ethiopian Jews, the German Jews, the Polish Jews and all of the other Jews that make up Ashkenazi populations… we come from so many places across the world and while there are things that are traditionally Israeli food, such as falafel, schwarma, hummus, I still find myself asking… “what is Jewish food?” I’ll tell you what it is not… milk and meat mixed together or pig! J Other than that, I feel like anything goes! It just depends on whose house you are invited to for Shabbat!
In terms of asking the question:
Have you ever had one of those moments? You are in a room full of people and you have to reach a decision. Each person has 5 opinions and you can’t accomplish anything because you have 10 people and 50 opinions around the table. Well, look around. You might be in a room full of Jews. There is a long standing joke about Jew’s and our opinions. We have many of them. Oftentimes, conflicting. And you will never be hard pressed to find a Jew who is asking “why?” I think this is one of the reasons that Israel is such an amazing place. Can’t figure out an answer, well, lets keep working at things until we do find some kind of answer. And even when you find the answer, never stop asking “why?”
One of my favorite things about Judaism and the way that I was educated about it is the fact that there is no answer. It makes me think of a young child and how he goes through the “why” phase when he starts wanting to understand the world a bit more and why things work the way that they do. In Judaism, “because” is not an appropriate response to any question asked about why we, as Jew’s, practice certain things or believe certain things. We are taught to question everything. Well, this is what it says, but what does this word mean in that context?
I heard a conversation like this last night. We were discussing the weeks parsha at dinner (I will write about my first Shabbat in Jerusalem a bit later on) and it is about Cohens. Apparently, a Cohen with a blemish can not go up on the beemah. Apparently if one arm is shorter than the other or one leg is shorter than the other then the Cohen can not perform his duties. So, it was brought up that pretty much everyone has these kinds of discrepancies between their legs or arms. No one has two arms of exactly the same length, so is everyone disqualified? Rabbi Quint, who we were eating with, said of course not. It is only referring to obvious blemishes as they would not go around measuring each Cohens limbs to make sure they were exactly the same length.
Point being, we always have to ask for more explanation and nothing is taken to mean exactly the way it is written.
In terms of supporting Israel or living in Israel:
I do not subscribe to the belief that all Jew’s belong in Israel. Quite the opposite, in fact. I think that while Israel is the right place for some of us, it is important that we continue to live in places outside of Israel. The world is not the safest place for the Jewish people. Many countries are facing renewed anti-Semitism and we all know what happened in the 1930’s and 1940’s under Hitler’s rule in Germany. We need Jews out there in the world to encourage their governments to support Israel’s interests. Israel gets a bad rep in the world and its important that there are people out there who continue to fight for her.
Does that mean that all Jew’s must support Israel? I think that this going back to the important ability to question. I think that blindly supporting any government or nation is borderline stupid. I want to spend my life here and raise a family here. Does that mean that I support everything that the Israeli government does? Absolutely not! Sometimes I find myself reading the news and wanting to kick someones ass. “Why did they do that?” I ask myself. I do NOT by any means agree whole-heartedly with everything that the government of Israel does. I am not going to get started on the things that I don’t agree with. That is a whole different blog post. In the end though, I recognize the need for Israel to exist and I think that it is important that even if I don’t agree, I speak up for the things that I do agree with and I continue to try and make my voice heard here when I don’t agree with something that is going on.
Is being a Jew about being born to a Jewish mother?
There is a lot of controversy surrounding this issue right now regarding immigrants from the FSU (Former Soviet Union). I can not answer this question. I do, however, think it’s a real shame that the government of Israel is doing so much to try and weaken these people. Especially those who serve in our military and live in Israel, speak the language, and have spent their lives here. Being a Jew is more than just the blood that runs through our veins. I hope that the government comes to recognize that someday.
Modern Judaism in the Diaspora:
One of things that I am working on at the Jewish Agency is helping to find resources for a blog called “Jewish Renaissance” which is focusing on finding pluralistic or non-denominational resources for people who may not identify religiously but want to find more information. I have come across many interesting things while doing my research for this blog.
Thinking back to what I felt like before I came here to Israel I am left at an interesting crossroads that leaves me with the question, “how do I feel now?”
Before I came to Israel I wanted little, if nothing, to do with Judaism. When I was younger I went through a phase where I came home from a USY convention wanting to practice Judaism more. I started to keep kosher (well, kosher-style) and went to synagogue a bit more often. Eventually some things happened to me and I stopped caring and was even pushed quite far away from Judaism. I think part of the problem was that I had no one (aside from my family) that encouraged me to develop my Judaism further. I didn’t have help answering the questions that I had. So, while I did it for a while, it never continued to develop and my understanding of why I was doing the things that I was doing never deepened.
The things that happened to me really pushed me to the opposite side. Not only did I stop practicing what I had started, but, I disconnected myself as much as possible from the Jewish community. I blamed it for the bad things that had happened to me. Here is a little insight into my erroneous thought process: I was adopted when I was a baby and presumably I was not born to Jewish parents. I have always been quite different from anyone in my family and I often blamed this on the fact that I am adopted. So, here I was, this non-Jewish person, forced into Judaism when I was a child even though it was something that was not right for me. I was not Jewish and did not belong in the Jewish community.
When it came time to make a choice about where I wanted to go to college, going to a college with other Jewish students was at the bottom of the list of things that I cared about. I chose a college with very few Jewish students and was quite happy with my choice. I continued for years without any connection to my Judaism. If I was writing a book about my life, I think I would title that part of the book “the Lost Years”
Years later, my Mom was encouraging me to go on a Taglit Birthright Israel trip and I had very little interest in going. Why would I want to go to Israel? I am not really Jewish. I wasn’t even really born Jewish, after all. “Erin, it’s a FREE 10-DAY VACATION! What more do you need? Just go for the vacation!” So, I signed up and came to Israel last summer. Here I am almost 10 months later, trying to make my aliyah plans. My poor mother is kicking herself, I am sure.
Throughout my time on OTZMA I have realized many things. I can be Jewish without practicing religiously. So, maybe I wasn’t born Jewish…. Okay, here it comes… but I have learned something very interesting that sounds cheesy to me when I say it out loud or write it out, but it’s the way that I feel. They say that people who convert to Judaism are simply Jewish souls that were born into the wrong body. My soul knew so very early where it belonged and I was converted to Judaism very early on in my life. I now know that Judaism is not a curse that was forced upon me. I may not have consciously picked Judaism the way that many people who convert do, but Judaism picked me. Even just writing that has such strong meaning for me that I am tearing up a bit!
So, I may not keep Shabbat (I am writing this on Shabbat, oops) and I may not keep Kosher and I may not do a lot of things that I am supposed to do. I don’t know if it will always be this way but it doesn’t matter. No matter what I do, I am Jewish. I could leave Israel tomorrow and move to a town with no Jews and never look back, I would still be Jewish.
I have developed a new sense of pride about being Jewish and a new sense of self as well. When I have a bad day here, I look out at the landscape in front of me and I am continually amazed. How lucky am I to be here, in this place?!?
I had a beautiful moment the first night that I was here on OTZMA. We were in the desert and we were lead out into the darkness in silence. We were given some time to lay in the sand and to think about the next 10 months and the time leading up to our OTZMA trip. I felt an overwhelming sense of emotion as I thought about the journey that lay in front of me. As I ran my hands through the desert sand, I felt overwhelmingly small and at the same time, like I still mattered and that what I do while I am on this Earth does make a difference. I thought back to our ancestors, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Moses and all of the others… This could be the same sand that they walked through on their journey. These stars that I am looking up at, are the same stars that guided them through the night sky. Each person in our history is like one of those grains of sand or stars in the sky. Just one person. Just one grain of sand. Just one star in the sky. But when you add us all up together, we make the Negev, we make the glorious night sky, we make up all of the things that matter in this world. And even though each of our ancestors was just one person, think of the things that they were able to do! And just think, even one grain of sand, if it gets in your eye, can make a hell of a difference!
I think that one of the problems with being Jewish in the Diaspora is just that. I think that so many people think that to be Jewish you have to connect through a synagogue or something of that nature. You can’t just be Jewish culturally when you are not living in a Jewish culture. In Israel you are living in the midst of Jewish/Israeli culture, so of course you are Jewish. In the US it is far more challenging to be connected when you are living in a community where you are a minority. I think that many of the young people that I know who are Jewish but don’t identify as being “affiliated” are just like me. They don’t feel connected to keeping Shabbat and to keeping the holidays but that doesn’t mean that they aren’t Jewish. They just don’t know how to do anything else.
How do we help young Jews to feel connected to Judaism, even if they don’t feel a connection religiously? It’s a big question without a clear answer. Luckily, somewhere, there is a room full of Jew’s asking “why?” and trying to figure out how we can keep Judaism alive and kicking!
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