Today is my birthday!

So today I am 26 years old.  Birthdays are always super weird for me.  The thing that is weird about my birthday is that I know it means a lot to someone else too.  26 years ago today, a woman that I don't even know gave birth to me and then gave me away.  I am so thankful for what she did for me.  I have the most AMAZING parents in the world and I wouldn't give them up for anything.  Its hard to be so far away from them... for the ups, for the downs, for my birthday.  But I know that they are happy that I am having a good time here in Israel and that I have had this amazing year here.  My Mom and Dad are the ones who gave me this chance.  They are the ones that made me who I am and they have been there every step of the way for me.  So today I am super thankful to technically have 2 mothers.  The mother who gave birth to me and my Mom, who raised me.  Maybe I wasn't "grown" in her belly... but she always used to tell me that I grew in her heart.

The funny thing about it is that I was literally the most accidental on-purpose baby.  Clearly I was an accident for my birthmother.  No one intentionally has a baby just to give that baby up for adoption.  But at the same time, I was the most on purpose baby in the world too.  My parents went through quite the extensive process to be able to adopt me.  They wanted a baby more than anything and luckily for me, I was the baby that was meant for them.

There is something beautiful that people say about converting to Judaism.  They say that for those that convert, their soul was born into a different body but it finds it way back to Judaism.  I think that not only did my soul find its way back to Judaism early, but my soul found its way to the people who were meant to be my parents.  Cheesy, I know... but couldn't be more true.

If I think back on my 25th year on this planet, it has been one of the biggest years in my life.  So many things have happened over the course of the year.  So many AMAZING things.  I think that I have done more growing as a person this year than I had in the 24 years before.  Its hard to believe that the year is over and OTZMA is ending in 16 days.

One of the big things that has changed this year is my outlook on life.  I had a conversation with my Mom a while ago about finding my birthmother.  For the first time in my life, its not a priority.  I don't know what I was looking for.  I think that for some reason I believed if I found her I would find out something about myself.  Now I know that I don't need to know who she is to know who I am.  I know who I am and I like who I am.  I used to tell people that I wanted to find her because it was a piece of the puzzle that is missing.  If you look at your life like a puzzle, she is one piece that is missing.  Its true.  I used to focus on the hole that was left by the missing piece.  Now I know that even though that one little piece is missing, the thousands of other pieces are still there.  So maybe its not 100% complete, but its damn close and instead of focusing on that little hole and what is missing, I now see that the rest of it all in place, right where it needs to be.

This year so far my birthday has been amazing thanks to my amazing friends that I have met over the course of the year.  I am really feeling the love today and I can't even believe that last year on my birthday I didn't even know these people.  In the past year, I have made some of the most amazing friends in the world and I couldn't be luckier that they were with me to celebrate!!